We Need To Talk

Posted on Fri Mar 4th, 2022 @ 10:27am by Commander William Gerhard & Ensign Alexandra 'Lexi' O'Connery

Mission: Mission 5 - Babel
Location: Observation Deck - Deck C
Timeline: Day 280 14:00
2575 words - 5.2 OF Standard Post Measure

The stars were beautiful – each a twinkling spot of fairy-light in a field of blue, as numerous as the grass that surrounded her, but infinitely more precious. It was quiet where Lexi lay on the observation deck floor, and an uncommon peace had settled into her body, freeing her from the aches and pains and agonies of the last few days. Maybe it was the painkillers that she had taken on an empty stomach that was making her think too deeply.

As her sluggish mind pondered this, her eyes fixed on the stars, she fancied herself an astrologer sometimes when she could see the stars. Lexi was pretty sure that she should have gotten up and eaten something but it was hot and she had wanted something different after being cooped up in sickbay and then everyone had been mother henning her due to her hobbling around on crutches and with memory issues. It was strange when she could not remember them properly other than colleagues. She knew they cared but it was hard work when she did not have the shared experience memory. Though she now regretted deciding to lie on the floor as she didn’t have the energy or will to move now that she was comfortable.

The silence she was enjoying was suddenly shattered by a door opening and closing. “I am down here. I am fine. I was star gazing.” She called out before anyone saw her and panicked that she was lying on the floor with her leg in a cast.

William had been to sickbay to visit Lexi, but he was told she had gone to the observation deck. William had been to see Lexi a few times before, but Dr. Avira had advised him that while the visits were nice, William needed to be more patient and understanding if Lexi didn't respond well to his visits. Already, William was finding himself back in his quarters when off duty silently brooding with his thoughts. He missed being able to talk with Lexi and be open with her, though he didn't blame her. He could tell that she felt somewhat familiar with him, but the familiarity they had had was gone.

He entered and heard Lexi call out. He followed the sound of the voice and stood over Lexi as she lay on the deck. While initially surprised she was on the ground, he knew chastising her would not go over well. He decided to take the non-challenge route as he raised an eyebrow, "I'm not even going to ask how you made it down there without hurting yourself." He then motioned next to her, "Mind if I sit?"

Lexi frowned as she tried to recognise the voice but it was not until he was stood over her looking at her confused and almost worried. "Go for it. But lieutenant you are under the illusion that I managed it without that and I would appreciate it if you did not tell the doctor. But I am quite fine apart from I do not have the energy to get back up." The woman said gently as she shook her head. She did not mind at all that he was there. He had been the first person that came to visit her and had been there waiting there for her to wake up.

He sat next to her and pulled his knees into his chest. He looked out at the stars before looking back over at her. "Well, It's good that I came along then. I can be here to help you up when you regain your energy," he said as he raised an eyebrow at her. He took note that she had referred to him by his rank and not his name. "And don't worry, your secret is safe with me, though I'd recommend not lying to Dr. Avira if she asks you about any fresh injuries. It's hard to get anything by her."

“I was just star gazing and relaxing. My painkillers kicked in and made me comfortable here. Could have been a lot worse.” She admitted hoping that he would not mother hen her like everyone seemed to be doing. "Thank you for the advice." She said looking up at him as he sat next to her and just looked at her. She stayed quiet not wanting to start an argument with someone who seemed to genuinely care about her for the fact he kept visiting and had been there when she woke up. She knew he was right but that did not mean he needed to know that he was right at all.

"Well, I'm sure your just happy to be out of sickbay. Personally, I would've done the same thing," he said before looking back out at the stars. He knew that she did not particularly like the close attention she had been getting from the medical staff. He knew that correcting her behavior or making any other suggestions would irritate her, so he decided not to mention it. "It's a shame we will be leaving the planet soon. If you really wanted to see some nice stargazing, I'd take you down to the planet for the night," William said as he leaned back on his forearms.

“I needed to get out and the doctor needed me out of the sickbay as well. She refuses to leave whilst I am there.” It was respectful but very much not needed when Lexi could easily manage in her own space in her quarters and hobble around the communication center easily enough when she was allowed to return to duties. “Something tells me as I was on the planet when I got injured that we did that already.” She commented looking at how relaxed he looked. She was not oblivious to the signs.

"We have, in fact it was the night before. We were around a campfire and sipping moonshine some of the MACOs had made," he responded. He had been advised by Avira to not venture information unless she asked. Supposedly this would keep her from being overwhelmed, but William ws starting to think that strategy wasn't the best. He looked over at her for a moment before chuckling slightly and looking back down at his boots, "Christ, I feel like i'm walking on eggshells now."

“So you want to talk about it all? The elephant in the room? Because since I’ve woken up I think back to that session we had drunk kissing at Captain Morgan’s party and I wonder how much further things have gone. You keep visiting and looking at me like… I cannot describe it in any language.” She wondered quietly looking back at the stars so her gaze was not watching him.

He took a moment before looking back over at her, "Well, as much fun as that session was at that party, yes things between us have gone much...much further." He collected himself before continuing, "After that time at the party, we waited a few weeks before we started spending time with each other more. Then things became...intimate...between us. We both decided to keep it under wraps though, both underlings that didn't want to get busted by our department heads. But after the Vrav incident, we started growing closer and not really caring if we got caught."

He paused and took a breath, then he looked at her softly, "The last few days we finally told each other we loved one another." He said this tenderly, but he also braced himself for her reaction to this news.

The woman nodded, it made sense for the way her brain kept lighting up whenever he was in the same room. She believed him, she could hear the tone in his voice and the familiar of them just lying there talking. She slowly leant out and put a hand over his. “I do not remember. I am sorry I cannot imagine what is going through your head right now. The confusion and heartbreak.” She could vividly remember his expression when Avira had warned him that it might not be possible for her to remember. “Are you okay?” She wondered.

He looked down at her hand over his as he slowly intertwined his fingers with hers. He was never really one to talk about his feelings overly, but Lexi had brought that side out of him some. He looked at her, and he found comfort in the soft gaze she was giving him. "It's just," he began before pausing to look away, "Ever since we've met and been together, I've felt more open and not shut off to everyone. I've felt like I'm not alone and that I have someone who will pick me up when i'm down. I don't want to go back to being alone."

The communication officer took him in. “I am still here and I am still very um… attracted to you.” She laughed not at all having any shame. She was the woman who captured him at the party and had refused to take no for an answer.

William laughed at her response and looked back over at her. His heart warmed with the fact that she was still able to find the humor in the little things. "Well, that makes me feel better. Does thins mean we are in for a shot for shot repeat of our time at that party," he asked while giving her an upraised brow. Their first time together had seen her pretty much corner him and then pounce as she had pushed him into a vacant room where they had made out. As he remember, it all seemed very high schooly.

Lexi smiled. Maybe it was the medication that was kicking in or maybe it was the fact she just knew that he was the one who would never let her down. “Not today. Maybe tomorrow.” She said positively. “But also I remember that.” She reminded. “I need to find out what comes next.”

He smiled at her and for the first time since the accident, he truly felt hopeful. He had been worried that her memory loss would change her feelings for him, but he was pleased to see that she still felt a certain way about him. He looked back out at the stars with a renewed hope, "Well, stargazing is a pretty fitting way to restart the journey together." He then looked over at her and got a clever thought, "Although I must tell that I know you snore so just be prepared for that." He waggled his eye brows at her as he stiffled a laugh.

The woman frowned before she shook her head at him as a flash of familiarity in his words. “Well maybe I don’t want to start this journey if you are going to comment on that. It feels like you do that a lot.” She smiled at him.

"Oh and one other thing, when you get back into your quarters, don't be alarmed by some of the pairs of boxer briefs in your drawers, they are mine," he said playfully again as she gave him a smile.

“That is…” she paused trying to find the words to describe the seriousness of having clothing in someone else’s quarters. “…serious.” She wondered.

William looked back over at her slightly concerned by her change in tone. "You did say you wanted to know how far we had gotten, unfortunately thats part of it," he said before quickly back tracking, "I can get those items out of there before you get to return to your own space." He looked away again worried that he had said the wrong thing.

“No… no for someone who knows seven languages fluently I am struggling to work out how I let you in after what I went through with David.” She really hoped she had mentioned the abuse that she had gone through or it was going to be a brutal realisation for them both as well as something amazing. “I promised myself I would never fall in love or make myself vulnerable for another man.” She said softly.

William looked at her in a new light. While he knew she had gone through a rough relationship before, they had never truly discussed it. "We never really talked about what you went through before. I think we both began opening up to each other after we realized how long the journey home will be. I know you have alot of pain in your past, I just figured you'd share more in your own time."

"Oh..." She blushed and shrugged at the fact they had never really opened up properly. "I used Starfleet to run away from an abusive relationship. I am sure... her .... me would have told you at. I barely know you right now William but I think after watching me wake up with no knowledge of you other than our fumble in that room." She admitted with another shrug. It was pretty simple in her mind there and then to tell him, he had put everything on the line to speak to her so she needed to let him know how far she had obviously come in the year or so that she did not remember.

He nodded and looked out at the stars again as he considered what to say next. They had talked about why she had joined Starfleet, but the extent of the abuse hadn't been discussed. "We did talk about that, but you didn't go into to much detail. If it's any consolation I had a similar experience," he paused before looking over at her, "Growing up was pretty hard for me. Father wasn't around much because he was in Starfleet, mother was pretty strict and unforgiving because i was a surprise to them. The only reason I'm here in Starfleet is because it was enlist or spend time in prison."

And there it was, she thought to herself coming to the realisation of what had attracted her to him. "And there we see why I must have liked you this last year... I am weakness for the bad boy." She teased him sounding much more like her usual self than she had been since the future ship they had found.

He looked over at her and started to answer when the attention tone sounded and he heard through the comm, "All Senior Officers report to the bridge." William looked back over at her and smiled a bit, "If you'd like I can save the rest of the story for the next time."

"I would like that." She assured looking up at the familiar voice of Leroux sounding throughout the ship. "But do you think you could help me up before you run off?" She asked blushing. She really was not sure she would get up from where she was without some help.

"Of course," he said with a smile. He picked up her crutches first and leaned them against the bulkhead before scooping her up in his arms. He was careful not to jostle her leg to much and he gently lowered her feet to the deck as she grabbed the crutches. Once she was on her feet, he opened the door and waited for her to exit before he followed her into the corridor. He felt hopeful as he watched her go before making his way to the turbolift.