Safe To Approach Part 1

Posted on Tue Apr 4th, 2023 @ 9:28am by Warrant Officer Iryna Voznyuk & Staff Sergeant Nathanial "Nate" Cusack

Mission: Sojurn
Location: MACO Barracks
Timeline: Day 334
4078 words - 8.2 OF Standard Post Measure

Iryna was not sure this was at all wise but she ventured towards the gym nonetheless where she knew he would be. She had spent the day licking her own wounds from the confrontation with the executive officer. She knew he was right, but it did not mean she had admitted it herself. She did not want to even if it was the best route for the greater ship, but maybe she did need to start acting more Earth Starfleet and less Military Assault Command Operations. It was a learning curve for all of them, but it did not mean she had to like the way it made her feel inadequate when she stopped the situation getting any worse. She wore typical gym clothes or trainers, shirts and a loose tee with her hair up in a tight ponytail. “So have you done enough sulking? Is it safe to approach?” She wondered quietly keeping close to the compartment door.

The slam of a locker door suggested it possibly wasn't the best way to phrase that particular question. Unlike her, Nate had spent a good deal of time thinking about his current situation; brooding some might call it, and had reached a fairly blunt opinion about where to apportion responsibility. Pre-meditated physical assault, he wagered, was probably a decent line to draw in the sand and so he'd accepted only minimal treatment for his busted up hand to make sure there wasn't anything likely to cause permanent damage and counted the discomfort as justifiable consequence. Being accountable and owning his part in the debacle ought to have been viewed as a decent sign of character growth except it hadn't stopped Calanthe ripping him a new one and Jamesson's pious bleating that it was all his fault had done more to infuriate the marine than placate him. It quite clearly was not the case and saying so felt more like a martyr's attempt to draw sympathy than an actual fair and reasonable extension of apology.

And now he was being accused of sulking. Nate may have been particularly inept at putting on a happy face and pretending that being confined to ship wasn't just flinging him back into the same prison that had almost left him willing to strand himself 150 years away from home in the middle of a snowfield, but he'd been trying to just get through it. That may have meant a lot of time spent in the gym or locked in his quarters when he wasn't being put to work. He had nothing left in his bag of tricks to help him cope so if that wasn't good enough, he was probably screwed after all.

The flick of his gaze sideways made eye contact, which wasn't laden with the flashing anger that had got him into the situation in the first place but still managed to contain a warning that word choice mattered at this point. "Wasn't me set the timer." A towel draped around his shoulders was used to wipe down his face. "I thought you were staying on the surface."

The gaze that he sent her way did not make her falter but she moved closer. She shook her head at the concept of staying on the surface, it was a nice idea, but she wanted to pop home and see him. She could go back there at any point, but he could not so she decided that she wanted to check that he was okay. “I can go back there later but wanted to check that you were okay.“

The ruffle of towel through his damp hair didn't lend Nate much of an air of dignity afterwards, tufts sticking up in all directions, but it at least alleviated a little of the rigid tension that wasn't aimed at her so much as it had just become a vital part of him trying to keep his shit together. "Not much choice otherwise. It's either 'be okay' or upgrade my holiday package to brig-side view."

The woman lent up, brushing some of the hair back into place but left a few strands up she did not think he would want to look to perfect. “Fancy having a sparring session?” She asked glancing back to the mats that were in the middle of the gym, surrounded by the weights, the running machines and any other device you could think of that could keep you in shape.

It was all it took to drag some of his bone-deep weariness to the surface. Holding up his still-damaged hand, Nate exhaled deeply. "Not sure how that would work. I'm sure there's evidence enough that I've probably done enough of that this week." Relenting somewhat, he glanced towards the space. "I can spot you if you want." It would still smart a little but bracing himself behind a punching shield was a better idea than trusting himself to square up to her in open combat.

“Forgot your hand was still hurt.” She chastised herself mostly for forgetting. “I’m sorry I thought maybe sparring might help, but I would love you to spot. No one else quite as solid.” It was a good compromise even if she was not sure it was the one that she wanted. She moved to grab not kick boxing gloves and offered a smile to him.

Though he'd refrained from any painkillers, Nate had at least consented to having his hand properly wrapped. A flexible sleeve over the top had applied decent compression and also made it less problematic to form a fist. Gripping hold of a punch shield in both hands wasn't too difficult, though he'd have to lean his shoulder in a little more on that side to combat the jarring impact. She was usually precise enough that he probably didn't need to worry in any case.

Stepping onto the mat, Nate braced and waited, much of his current mood evident in the fact he was so willing to remain silent. Voznyuk had labelled it sulking but it was a little more introspective than that, and a lot more indicative of inadequate sleep.

“Tell me when you have had enough.” She told him as she started to hit the shield and then started to kick it. Whilst he was angry at the world around being stuck on the ship, she just felt angry at the world.

Had there been an opportunity to correct her, Nate might have had a few sparkling revelations about how far down his festering resentment went. It wasn't his nature to share, however, any more than it was natural for him to self-reflect with any objective intent. When had it ever mattered that his father's treatment was the catalyst for so much of his son's trouble? The system favoured the elder and always had.

Placing his damaged hand just a fraction back so that the other took the brunt of each impact, Nate pushed back just enough to give her a solid contact and closed his eyes for a moment.

Sweat poured down her forehead, but she did not stop. She had a goal in mind, and she was determined to achieve it. With each blow, she felt her frustration and anger leaving her, replaced by a sense of focus and determination.

In direct opposition, Nate's demeanour was uncharacteristically withdrawn, a far cry from the usual motivational banter that had always made him a favourite for this kind of role. Provocation, almost more than encouragement, became vital in dragging the best out of his opponents and if there was one thing Cusack could do with startling regularity, it was piss people off to the point where they wanted to try punch him in the face. Whether because he knew that wasn't warranted now, or just because he couldn't find it within himself to rattle her cage, he opted for mostly-silence, only the occasional murmured praise or suggested stance correction to break it up.

Iryna eventually stopped when she noticed that he was no where near his normal self. She had not seen him quite so deep and thoughtful before other than the yesterday but aye thought that they had processed that enough to move forward. “What is wrong?” She asked finally revealing that she was breathless.

Squinting through a trickle of his own sweat, a product of earlier exertion and the somewhat uncomfortable temperature that seemed to be a symptom of the current repairs being done to systems, Nate regarded her candidly for a minute before offering a half-hearted smirk. "You mean besides the fact that your balance on the left-turning roundhouse is still wonky?" It was a gentle tease and not necessarily all that accurate, acting more as a deflective response than actual feedback.

“When you are feeling better I will show you how wonky it is… so yes besides that minor fault that you have with me.” She demanded as she started to take off the gloves to put into the decontamination unit. She would have lobbed it back at the man normally but she needed to get some water in her face.

Nate didn't really have an answer. There wasn't anything new, nothing that hadn't been dredged up in disjointed agitation during their conversations recently. If anything, it was more exacerbation of pre-existing problems, the chief culprit being how quickly he had felt caged in again. It didn't bode well for facing up to the prospect of eventually having to leave the planet. "Same old, same old," became his response as he wriggled his injured hand free of the shield. "Only had myself to mutter to and even then, I got tired of my own shit. Been a full few hours since I spoke out loud, I guess I got used to it." He flexed his sore fingers and then followed to deal a similar treatment to the punch shields, leaning around her with one hand against her shoulder so that the physical contact, whilst sticky, became part of his unspoken apology.

The woman nodded at the contact and offered a small smile to him. It was okay if that was all it was she did not want to dredged up any more than she needed to even if she wanted to get to know him properly. “Fair enough.” She decided was better to just keep it simple. She dropped the gloves into the unit and turned to look up at him.

For the first time since she'd shown up, Nate took a moment to get a proper read on the woman who so neatly fit under his chin, which was an uncommon feat for someone with legs that went on for as long as hers did. It was, admittedly, a thinly veiled excuse to admire her flushed face but also served as a reason for him to offer a tired smile. He had, in his own determined-not-to-let-it-bother-him way, missed her. Reaching up, he dragged a strand of damp hair away from her eyes. "Doesn't feel like much of a punishment," he admitted quietly, "if I'm allowed visits from my corrections officer."

“Do you feel like you need to be punished more?” She asked quickly looking confused by his statement. “And I can stop visiting any time you want.” She added not challenging just simply leaving the ball in his court.

Nate closed his eyes briefly, a clear moment to gather his wits, and shook his head with an over-abundance of weary exasperation. "Not what I meant." Ducking his chin towards his chest, he drew a breath in and let it out as a huff before opening his eyes to look at her again. "I'm glad you came." The universe gave him an extra prod to the buttocks and he added, "I was worried you wouldn't."

“Gerhard ripped me apart for not reporting you and Jamesson to him but I would have eventually come to find you.” She said quietly. It was easy to see they could both use showers and sleep again but she needed to get someone questions answered before that.

The roll of his eyes was far more predictable. "Give a guy a promotion and he can't wait to dick-whip everyone." It wasn't a flattering opinion and, in this case, perhaps not entirely warranted, but it spoke to Nate's previous experience that it was his immediate default. It also stirred up an unwanted sense of guilt, which didn't really sit comfortably on top of his current emotional load. His bottom lip curled against his teeth and Nate shook his head, both hands settling on her shoulders to offer a squeeze that was partially meant as consolation but also managed to convey his frustration. "So new rule; report Cusack when he deserves it."

The woman blinked at his phasing, but shook her head. “He was completely right too. I did not handle it how I should have handled it like a marine instead of the Earth Starfleet officer that they want me to be. I thought I handled it but it was not.” She shrugged but did not dislodge his hands but did move his to spread out across his chest.

"Funny how that was good enough when they were sending us in for slaughter." Nate, of no surprise to anyone, had not accepted the imminent merging with anything resembling grace. He was not a space explorer, there had been an opportunity to sign up for that and he'd turned it down point-blank. Being assigned to work aboard one of their vessels had undoubtedly been some bastard's idea of a joke, a chance to stick it to Cusack and remind him he had no control over his career. Being forced into the role by proxy, without so much as the courtesy of discussing it with him first, was just indicative of the same kind of disregard as far as Nate was concerned.

“I have never been sent anywhere I was not unwilling or scared to go.” She reminded leaning up to put a kiss on his jaw trying to placate him. “Please do not go there. Not today and not right now. I deserved it, I should have handed your ass in.” She said quietly.

It took effort, and visible strain, but Nate curbed his natural response. Being forced to hold his tongue and weather some superior's big clever plans for his career was such a staple that he almost wanted to laugh at the notion that he'd ever considered being flung several lifetimes away from home could make any difference. He was a marksman and a damned good one, but if there was nothing that required his timing and accuracy with a weapon then what else did he have to offer? Nate doubted Gerhard cared, he was still trying to wrap his head around the fact that Voznyuk might. "I'm not asking you to make excuses for me. Last thing I need is for my fuck ups to drag you down with me."

"I never would Nate but I had fixed it and neither of you caused any damage to anyone other than each other." She whispered softly. "It is a learning curve." She murmured with a smile. "I want to be here to drag you out of these fuck ups." She commented softly.

A single huff of humourless laughter was all the expression Nate needed. Some of the tension had drained from his posture though, and he relented despite the fact both of them needed a shower by pulling her in to rest his chin atop her head. "Well, at least you won't be bored then."

The woman smiled a little as she was pulled against him and moved her hands from his chest to settle around him. "Just relax... just be." She reminded him squeezing him just a little. It was not often that she was made to feel so small but stood there surrounded by him she felt tiny. It was nice despite the fact they were both sticky.

"Has it occurred to you that this is me 'just being'?" The quip was a little closer to a normal retort, the arch of his eyebrows accompanied by a lopsided smirk that resolved itself as an amused huff. "You've got access to my service record, you tell me what a normal day in the office is for Nate Cusack."

“Not in the slightest. I know you are more.” She whispered simply as she pulled back to look up at him seeing the arch of his eyebrows. She leant up and kissed his lips just once before settling down on her feet.

A playful narrowing of his eyes saw Nate ponder this fresh perspective into his finer attributes. "More what? More trouble?" His lips twitched as he winked at her. "More stubborn?" He leaned his head forward to settle is forehead against hers. "More charming?"

His next movement was a flourish, an unexpected explosion of intent that saw him capitalise completely on the distraction of intimacy by suddenly swooping her up into a drape over his shoulder so that he could commence the march towards the showers. "Wait, I've got it; more annoying."

“No, Nate.” She whispered as her whole view was turned 180 and she was marched towards the showers. What was he thinking? “Put me down!” She added just as quietly. She knew there were not many MACO’s onboard at the moment but they would come searching if there was enough noise.

As much as capering about wasn't something that Nate himself indulged in often, it was more a lack of opportunity than a lack of motivation that kept his playful side tucked away. If there was one thing he had learned during that fateful night of trying to make sure she didn't drink herself into oblivion, it was that Iryna Voznyuk enjoyed the ridiculous once in a while if she could be coaxed into relaxing long enough to embrace it. He grinned at her protest and merely replied, "We work out, then we shower. That's procedure, ma'am, aren't you supposed to be encouraging me to follow that?"

“You could do it in your own barracks.” She murmured as he strode past all the lockers to the showers at the back of the small MACO gym. He was such a smug git sometimes that she had no idea how to handle this.

"I am simply," Nate retorted as he manoeuvred them the last few steps, "trying to pull my weight. Here." Stooping a little, he returned her to her feet and stepped back, hands held up as if to surrender. "No tip necessary, completely complimentary service. I figured you'd rather shower here than make all the way back to barracks only to find they've taken our showers offline for the day." It probably wasn't directly timed to inconvenience him but since Jamesson was deeply involved in all these repairs and upgrades, Nate wouldn't have been surprised to find the scheduling just a little too convenient.

Iryna leant out and nudged his arm and shook her head at him as she tried to reorder her hair. “You could have just stated. Going to get the wrong idea that you want to just carry me around.” She decided to just tease him like she normally would.

"You might as well get used to the lack of warning, I can't guarantee a head's up prior to every single crazy idea that strikes me." Nate folded his arms across his chest and grinned. "Not when surprising you is so rewarding." He leaned in then, cheek to hers, and murmured in her ear, "Enjoyment looks good on you. We need to aim for it more often." Then, with a peck to her cheek, Nate winked and reached out to grab one of the clean towels before disappearing into a shower stall.

“Smug git.” She called after him as she shook her head. Enjoyment looked good on everyone but that was beside the point. She shook her self from her thoughts grabbing her own towels. She set them on the bench outside the stall she was going to use and went in search of clean clothes from the her locker. She sighed realising she only had another pair of shorts and a vest top. It would have to do she decided as she went to the furthest stall and slipped inside the screen.

Inside his stall, Nate basked for a moment in what paraded as an elevation of mood. It was unlikely to last because Iryna would eventually return to the surface under his insistence and he'd sink once again into the discontentment that made the menial jobs he was being assigned all the more tedious but the reprieve was appreciated, especially as a week ago he would have doubted the sincerity of its cause. Nate had to admit that there weren't many instances in his past where this current situation would have eventuated, being more inclined to charm his way into sharing a cubicle when the focus of past relationships had veered heavily towards physical attraction. To be fair, it was usually all the interest he'd been shown, and had proven time and time again to be the only thing women pursued him for. The novelty alone of Iryna's insistence on cultivating an emotional connection was intriguing. Nate wasn't sure he was very good at those but found himself willing to test the waters.

Ordinarily, he would have tied the towel around his waist and left the rest of the drying for the locker room but hesitation saw him rethink before he pulled aside the screen. With deliberate patience, he dried off where he stood, pulled a fresh shirt over his head to soak up the remaining dampness and pulled on boxer briefs before he stepped out. By the time the other marine was done, he'd found his jeans and was busy allocating things to laundry.

The shower brought contemplation that Iryna could not stop. She leant her head against the cool wall and just let the water wash over her for a few long moments. The water was not like the water on the planet and it was not as hot as she liked but it cleaned enough once she set s as bout doing it.

It took a lot longer than she expected but she soon stepped out of the cubicle wearing her vest and shorts minus shoes. Her hair was piled up in a towel. “Hey.”

The attempt at nonchalance amused Nate, but he consented to play along. "Fancy meeting you here." Possibly out of sheer obstinance, he maintained eye contact despite, as if to suggest there had never been a motivation otherwise to lower his gaze. "You good?"

The woman nodded quickly as she moved towards her locker to find a hairbrush and something to untangle the mess. It was hard being a woman on a ship that had limited resources for women products. "Yeah, I am. You?" She wondered quietly. It was not an easy task setting about to tame her hair but it felt good when there were no tangles.

It had been, at max, ten minutes. The sheer amount of sudden social awkwardness only made Nate's grin a permanent fixture, along with a pair of slightly raised eyebrows. "Are you going to curtsy next? What is this?"

"Just a bit different and awkward... this is the locker room." She laughed awkwardly trying to dispel the awkwardness in her appearance. "I told you I've never done this type of thing before... it's new." She explained turning to check a mirror.

"It's not like there's anyone else here." Nate glanced around as if to double-check and then raised his shoulders to shrug. "Nor is there likely to be, almost everyone's down on the surface." He studied her for a moment, intrigued if nothing else because it wasn't often that Voznyuk radiated vulnerability, even less frequently that she appeared so lacking in confidence. Stooping to pull his boots on, he stretched out an arm towards her. "Nothing keeping us here though. We can head back to barracks if you want."

"I know..." The woman said blushing brightly. It was silly saying it aloud but it felt different than them having taken showers down on the surface, this was a space they had shared without issues before but now it was different. "Da. Lets." She agreed with his idea of moving from there pulling on her socks and trainers.