Stumberling

Posted on Mon Jul 17th, 2023 @ 2:25pm by Warrant Officer Iryna Voznyuk & Staff Sergeant Nathanial "Nate" Cusack

Mission: Sojurn
Timeline: 337 Night
4775 words - 9.6 OF Standard Post Measure

Iryna laughed as she practically stumbled through the door of the room that she had and had become a little like home over the last five nights. She felt drunk but she knew her limit had nowhere near been reached with the two glasses of sparkling wine or what passed for wine on this planet. Both of them seemed to be in a good mood, which was nice. The tension and frustration was no longer the emotion that was highlighted which was nice as she leant back through the door and tugged him inside. She grinned up at him taking in every bit of his mischievous charm.

“Warm in here.” She declared thinking that the man could not complain at all about the temperature there.

It was likely fortunate that she hadn't chosen to voice that particular sentiment as, always swift to rise to the challenge, Nate was still battling with the niggling desire to sneeze despite the fact that his nose felt frozen solid. "Anywhere would be warm after that." A snow flurry had caught them on the tail-end of the trek home and, whilst Nate had to grudgingly admit that the city's infrastructure handled the climate exceptionally well, it was still unpleasant enough. Still, he felt in high spirits and had perhaps grown used to conditions enough not to let them weigh on his mind for too long, especially now that he was out of them. As if content to make himself at home, the marine watched for a moment as Iryna moved around the space and then made himself at home, sprawled on the couch. "Definitely an improvement though."

Iryna picked up her clothes from the floor where she had left things in a hurry after waking up and turned to him watching her. She added her jacket to the pile and looked satisfied that it looked clean again. “You good?” She asked quietly taking in him sprawled there looking only slightly less disgruntled than he had in the green house.

"I am now."

Only minutes after stepping inside and Nate's mood was already visibly improved. One arm stretched along the back of the sofa, a leg bent to casually rest its foot on his opposite knee, he certainly looked perfectly at peace, and the tug of his grin only added to a familiar smugness. "Temperature's improved." A pause made it obvious he was admiring her. "View has definitely improved."

“I don’t know bit damp and scruffy from our night out.” She argued with a smile looking him over back. “You look good.” She finally agreed moving to turn the temperature up just a little.

"Maybe I like damp and scruffy." The tease in his tone was unmistakable this time, and the dance of Nate's eyes was of a brand of direct flirtatiousness that he hadn't dusted off for a while. As much as he wasn't sure he actually knew what the sensation felt like, this seemed about as content as he remembered being in a long while. Perhaps it was letting her talk him into thinking of a life beyond the disbanded marine unit. Maybe it was the prospect of not being entirely alone in a universe designed to make him feel exactly that. Maybe it was because she was just damn beautiful and, for once, had taken the time to accentuate it.

“I am starting to think you do.” She laughed moving over to him and moved into the space and snuggled into the space there. She put her hand on his bent leg and and squeezed. “Which is not a bad thing and I appreciate that you have seen me at my best and worst and still here.”

"I am a man of many unexpected tastes," Nate promised, taking a moment before he eased an arm around her shoulders to pull her against his side. "And I don't think your worst is half as bad as you think it is." His hand settled near her elbow, where he gave it a squeeze. "Scary enough when provoked but that just means the other guy's gotta stay on his toes." Nate pulled back a little in an attempt to look at her. "I bet no one's underestimated you twice."

“Unique tastes.” She teased softly giggling at him before she sobered. He was very right, her bark was way worse than her bite but that was the way of any woman in MACOS in her opinion. They had to be tough to thrive. “Nope. No one underestimates me twice.” She agreed putting her hand on his chest and spreading her hand wide.

"I'll count myself amongst that number." A crooked grin made good with the admission, which achieved the impossible and dissolved into a lazy chuckle. "There are worse ways to be surprised though." Nate considered the claim a moment before adding, "I've probably experienced a few of them."

The woman smiled more and shook her head at him and what he was saying. “I like to think so.” She said quietly leaning forward to pressed herself against him more. “Warm enough?”

A pair of eyebrows hitched upwards. "Why, you got a brilliant idea for fixing it if I'm not?" A ghost of a returned smirk toyed with Nate's lips before he reached across with his free hand and tapped her on the nose. "Don't answer that. We've already established that you don't play fair."

“Oh I’d just put the heating up higher.” She teased ignoring his request and speaking her mind. No one had ever gotten her to shut up other than Gerhard and that was only cause she did not want to lose her role.

"I don't think baked marine is quite the dish you're looking for. Actually, I've warmed up nicely. Might have something to do with the fact someone keeps draping themselves over me and then grinning like a Cheshire Cat about it." Leaning down, Nate pressed his forehead to Iryna's. "Just remember," he murmured, "I have a long memory."

She was glad he was warming up herself as she had almost gotten chilled herself. The woman laughed and shifted a little and lay back across his lap. “I am fully aware you have a long memory.”

There was a noticeable silence as Nate stared down at his lapful of senior officer but it was a comfortable one that eventually became a reflective smile. Readjusting, he considered his options and chose to seek her hand with his, palms pressed together so that their fingers laced. Lifting both, he pressed a kiss to her knuckles and then settled, for once in no rush to diffuse the intimacy with unnecessary wit.

Iryna just smiled up at him taking in all the different lines on his face. She squeezed his hand and brought their hands back down to rest on her stomach. "I've had a really nice day with you." She finally said breaking the silence.

"I'm glad because that was definitely the goal." By now, it wasn't that Iryna hadn't heard his quieter tone but it was certainly the case that Nate didn't opt to indulge it very often. They were alone, however, and he was feeling exceptionally well-fed. And warm, for once. Almost toasty. "We'll have to squeeze in a few more before we're back to making the best of leisurely strolls around escape pods."

"I would like that... I get to pick the next location. Maybe something exciting." She said grinning slowly as she thought on something that she had seen earlier when she had been exploring by herself different areas.

"What, are you saying toothpaste plants aren't exciting?" Leaning his head back, Nate closed his eyes and permitted a familiar, yet decidedly mellow, smugness relax his features. "I'll have to up my game then."

"It is my game next." She retorted squeezing his hand. The quietness of the moment despite the back and forth was something new and unexpected but it did not feel uncomfortable at all. It was a new step in the potential of them.

"Was it ever not your game?" This, whilst impish in a sense, was also spoken with a degree of resigned fondness. Squinting open an eye, Nate added, "At the very least, I think you amassed an impressive lead before I even realised the starting gun had fired."

Iryna slowly shifted from his lap to sit up. "I am sorry that you feel like that. How can I change things so you can catch up?" She asked genuinely wanting to make thing right better them.

A faint frown creased Nate's forehead, though it did very little to dent the affection in his eyes. If anything, he seemed caught somewhere between amused and perplexed. "Nothing needs to change. If anything, you need to stay one step ahead, stop me doing a bunch of stupid shit." He offered her a half-smirk, tugged to one side. "Might have your work cut out there though."

"Not been doing too badly." She replied and nodded. "But I get what you are saying. I will keep trying." It was a quiet promise so she lent forward and kissed his nose. "You are a good man under all the facade, Nate." She said solemnly. He needed to hear it from someone.

As much as he offered no verbal refute, Nate's expression still veered towards mildly dubious. In the months leading up to accepting the rotation onto the Atlantis, which had seemed at the time like an attempt to shunt him out of the way for a while, Staff Sergeant Cusack had very definitely existed so close to the edge that he wasn't even sure some days that he hadn't already launched himself off it. Striving to be decent in the midst of so many loud and powerful opinions that had seemed determined to paint a different picture had reached a point of almost not seeming worth it. Why be the good guy when nobody wanted to believe you were even capable of it? A more moderate view of his experience to date might point out several influences with opinions closer to what Voznyuk was expressing but Nate wasn't particularly good at not inflating the negative to exaggerated proportions. Somewhere between the imagined and the actual rested his genuine situation and, right now, it was asking him to cling to hope. All things considered, that was a big ask.

"Helps to have people who still need you to do the decent thing," he eventually replied, his thumb grazing backwards and forwards against her stomach where their clasped hands rested. "I just wish there were a few more of us left."

"70 people isn't a bad number." The woman said trying to not react to his thumb on her stomach which was making her stomach to somersaults. It was a new feeling that she quite liked. "I believe in you." She simply. It was as simple as that to her, she had believed in all the MACO's despite giving them hell to do the right thing. They were all good but Nate had proven time and time again despite what he may think.

Her response left him silent again, caught out in yet another incident of feeling separate from the main crew. In the early days, of course, they had been and fostering that independence as a unit had been an important part of how they were meant to function and operate. Then they'd started dying, or disappearing at least, and now it had come to this. No more MACOs, just a bunch of displaced, lost soldiers forced to find somewhere else to belong. Nate frowned. "As long as we can keep it at that," he eventually replied, referring to crew numbers.

"I am sure that we can." Iryna was feeling more positive than she had in a very long time. Maybe it was food and drink that filled her stomach that was leaving her a little more emotionally full compared to other times. It was very different from her. "I'm feeling positive."

It was clear from the morose pause that followed that Nate didn't share her optimism. "The problem I have," he eventually admitted, his tone quiet and weary without most of its usual bitterness when he hit this topic, "with saying we'll do better next time is it implies we didn't already give our best. And if that's the case, what business do we have reassuring anyone? Couldn't save them before," he added, eyes staring straight ahead out the window, his expression such that it seemed likely he was talking more about his individual failings than the unit's. "It's a hard sell to say that's likely to change."

“We always do our best but sometimes are best isn’t another. But I will be positive enough for both of us until that time that you can feel the same.” Iryna slowly took her hand from his and moved from sitting next to him to stand up. She slowly moved to straddle his lap facing him, taking his face in her hands she leant forward and kissed him.

Ordinarily, this was the moment where Nate pointed out that her choices weren't matching her previous sentiments, where he accused her of being a tease and didn't fall far from the mark because it was one thing to want to take things slowly and another thing entirely to follow through with it when you were glued to each other and all the reasons for restraint seemed miles away from being relevant anymore. As it was, his hands settled first on her hips, and he put up absolute zero resistance to her kiss, despite the fact that hesitance on his part to overstep boundaries had put her way out ahead in instigation statistics. The physical urgency wasn't there, however, and when the embrace tapered to little more than reassuring pecks of tenderness, Nate chose instead to wrap his arms around her, pull her close, and bury his face in her neck.

She was relieved that the kiss had been responded to in the way she had hoped it was going to be. She was not thing to test him or her just just wanted to offer some comfort. “It is going to be okay.” She assured holding him against her running her hands into his hair and around his shoulders. “It might not seem like it but it is. Time just needs to work it’s charm on things.”

When he pulled back, there was an intensity to Nate's scrutiny that wasn't usually quite so open, honest and vulnerable in its ferocity. "If I do this, dip my toe back into medical, I'm not resigning my post." The stubborn set to his jaw was all-too familiar. "You can redeploy me, we need a new medic now that Benny's gone." There was a noticeable bob to his adam's apple as he mentioned his late bunkmate's name. "But if we draw weapons and there's reason to watch your back, I want to be the one staring down the scope." It was the one thing he'd always had, the competency with long-range that bordered on the unnatural. It had certainly got him further in his career than his charm and wit had, at any rate.

Iryna released her hold on him ever so slightly and nodded it was a simple request from the man and she could not exactly say no to it. “I will talk to Commander Gerhard.” She said quietly. She would rather him have been staring down the scope than anyone else. He was scarily good at shooting from that kind of distance.

A large hand, warm finally, settled against her cheek and its calloused thumb traced the line of her jaw as Nate pondered the dark edges of his thoughts. Vocalising them was almost unheard of, at least in any productive way. He felt compelled, however, to convey something, to communicate something. It seemed suddenly very important that she understood. "I don't care what happens to me." It was a worrying sentiment but it was the truth, finally. "I just need to make sure you keep coming back."

Iryna could not help but lean in and kiss him softly. “I will always come back to you and the others.” She knew some of the MACOs had thought there a curse on the senior officers in the unit but she had not thought that he had considered it could affect her.

And yet Nate had been consumed by very little else, for a lot longer than he'd realised at first. The death of his bunkmate had hit him hard, Benny was the kind of kid soldier that wasn't really cut out for the job but had a heart larger than Saturn and wanted to prove he could do his part. Nate, ill-equipped to be a decent big brother figure, had tried nevertheless and had ended up having to stare at an empty bunk every night for months. The loss of leadership was unsettling more on a functional level, or at least it had been a far less personal loss than the one he was now forced to contemplate if the trend continued. Voznyuk had been different even back then. Now, he couldn't see a way back if he had to reduce her entire life to a few meagre possession locked away in a trunk.

"You fucking better," he replied, and for once didn't care that a slight crack in his voice gave him away.

“I do not do curses.” She commented quietly leaning her forehead against his. She was almost stunned by his emotions towards her. It was way deeper than she thought was possible for him towards her.

"You get yourself into trouble, I'll do more than curse." It wasn't what she'd meant but given his capacity to be rather colourful with his language when fired up, it still seemed apt.

“Feel better now that you got that out there?” She finally asked as she pulled back her forehead to look him in the eyes properly.

Nate considered for all of a few seconds before offering a wry smile. "Nope." He seemed calmer, however, or at least a lot more tired. His hands sought a way to settle on her thighs that wasn't overly distracting for either of them and he added softly, "But there's something to be said for not feeling shit on my own."

“Ha we shall share the load then.” She laughed wrapping her arms around his neck. He seemed exhausted from sharing all his emotional load with her. It was the hard truth that emotions were hard for them all but he seemed to be suffering for it.

"Sucker for punishment, huh?" There was a fondness to his tone that wasn't often there, not without the layers of smug witticism that tended to override it in any case.

“On behalf of you sure.” She shrugged. It was a pretty easy estimate on why she was but it was not something she took lightly. She did not make that promise to everyone or sit on anyone else’s lap playing with their hair.

Blue eyes that normally sparkled with deflective humour, or darkened with brooding resentment, simply watched Iryna with uncommon pensiveness. Eventually, Nate smiled but it was faint and did little to mask the regret, or hamper the flash of warmth. "Hopefully we can keep that to a minimum too then." It occurred to Nate that his tongue was a little looser than usual, though he doubted the beer was the culprit. Was this what manning up felt like? If so, it was hard to apologise for taking so long about it, he felt...small. Worse yet, he felt fragile.

"So, what's the new boss got you doing?," he asked as a way of changing the topic. Stubborn to the last, Nate Cusack wasn't going to turn into a sappy puddle without a fight.

“Mostly regretting his choices I believe.”
Iryna said with a bit of of a shrug. She knew it would be a hard adjustment but she did not think it would weigh on her mind quite as much or cause so much conflicting with her own way of doing things.

"He's got you doing that?," Nate quipped, not so far gone that he couldn't rib her for misunderstanding. Both hands squeezed her thighs several times to tease. "That's a hell of a way to delegate."

The woman shrugged again before poking his shoulder. “Shall see what happens.” She commented shaking her head. “I have spent the last few days doing weapons checks and working different shifts to see how things work. Why I was asleep this morning.”

"Mhmn." The mischief was creeping back and, this time, Nate slid his hands up to her hips to settle as his eyebrows rose. "Sounds partially feasible." His thumbs kneaded into the softness of her waist, tauntingly close to what might be a viable tactic should one wish to pounce suddenly. "Of course, for all I know, you could have found yourself a handsome octopus." The eyebrows waggled. "Eight legs, complete with suckers, enough to keep anyone up all night."

The woman laughed and blushed a little at the imagery laying her head against his shoulder. “I could and I had offers but I thought of you instead.” She said teasing but the affection was just as strong.

For a moment, the hands lifts from her hips in defeat. "Now she's forcing me to square up to a cephalopod." It was a big word for such a smug grin. Nate slid his hands back into place, clasping them at the small of her back. "I hope they were happy thoughts at least." He paused, altogether too intentionally, and pursed his lips in exaggerated reflection. "Though if just thinking makes you oversleep, I'll have to get you a better alarm clock. Eventually." He winked at her.

The woman laughed lifting her head to look at him properly and smiled softly. “They were thoughts.” The woman commented on. “Would never force you to square up to anyone. Pretty sure I can square up to anyone before it gets to you.” She added grinning just as smugly. It was easy to go toe to toe with him.

"That right?" Not for the first time, Nate relied on the devilment in his eyes to act as distraction enough, at least to mask the subtle movement of one of his hands until it was digging its fingers into the softness of her stomach in search of a ticklish spot. "Probably shouldn't have left yourself so open then, Warrant Officer."

He attempted to rise in one swift movement, tucking himself so that she ended up flung over his shoulder just enough to be marched across the room and pinned against the kitchen bench. Grinning, Nate took a second stab at tickling her. "Happy to stop any time you want to concede defeat."

“Stop… stop it.” The woman cried as she tried to move away and defend herself as he pinned her and found a ticklish spot that even she did not know she had. “Stop… okay… you are a big manly man that can defend me.” She laughed breathless.

"What was that?" The burrow of his face into her neck was equally as playful, though it eventually required enough concentration that Nate consented to allow his open palms to rest against her hips; still a threat, but a subdued one for the time being. "Devour you?" He was pushing it, and through the fuddle of a rather excessive sense of goodwill and relaxation, Nate knew that he needed to back off. She was soft and smelt good, though, and it took all his willpower not to follow through with an attempt at gnawing on her collarbone. "Do you come in toothpaste flavour? That's really my current thing."

It took a moment for the woman to think of a reply when she was struggling to concentrate and think of a witty retort. “Five minutes in the bathroom and I do.” The woman laughed breathless her hands moved to his cheek to make him look at her.

It took the rapid flutter of his eyelashes blinking back some semblance of focus for Nate to pull himself into check. It was a subtle adjustment, an attempt to make sure he wasn't pressing against her too hard, a willingness to drag himself away from the temptation of an open neck despite very much favouring it as a place to get lost. She hadn't kneed him in the balls at least, which was exactly what he'd instructed her to do if he got too fresh, and so he simply settled for a crooked grin and the low rumble of a, "Hi."

The woman was still stunned from the way he hauled her around like she weighed nothing to move especially when he was pressing against her in a way she found herself quite enjoying. “Hey…” she whispered back before leaning forward, pulling him in for a kiss. It was just too hard to keep resisting whatever it was that had fireworks between them in that moment.

When it was all said and done, restraint wasn't something Nate had exhibited in any abundance. Certainly recent behaviour suggested he was rather lacking in the department, and his cavalier capacity to open his mouth without much concern for the consequences likewise painted him as a man not particularly prone to holding back. He had tried with her though; god, he had tried. She'd asked for a meandering pace and, despite the fact she kept throwing little curveballs at him, Nate had viewed her fleeting advances as more of a test than anything else and had been utterly determined not to fail. For once in his life.

Things were getting blurry, however, and there was something about this particular situation, so similar to the moment earlier in the day when they had nearly distracted themselves before she was even dressed, that was tantamount to waving a red flag at a bull. Returning the kiss was effortless, it took only the balance of one hand against the bench behind her to maintain his position whilst the other slid around to the small of her back and did its absolute best to stay there. An attempt to breathe tried to clear his head, the slight squirming to adjust to the placement of her leg nearly brought him undone entirely, and Nate bulldozed through the haze with what remained of his equilibrium to pull back and murmur even as his lips found her jawline, "Do you want me to go?" No part of him desired a positive response but it had to be her choice. It had been part of the deal, a promise not to let him walk in the shoes of those who'd hurt her in the past.

Iryna was not sure she had anymore energy for restraint, she did not want him to go at all. He have proved that something more was between them. “No…” she said breathless. It was simple and short. The word despite being so small was filled with so much. It was breaking down the last remaining barrier between them that had been causing tension.

"Are you sure?" He had to ask, even as the trail of his lips towards the spot just beneath her ear didn't do a lot to aid any attempt at pulling back if he had to. Nate lingered there, drew the tip of his nose gently across her warm skin, and then forced himself upright to look at her. There was no point hiding his interest, the placement of her thigh was already confirming that, but it was important to give her the opportunity to pull the brakes on whilst he still had the ability to walk from the room.

Iryna looked at him as he stared at her back. “Completely. I can’t keep resisting this even if the octopus suckers are very tempting.” She added quietly to add just enough levity so he knew she had not completely lost her mind.

He studied her face as best he could without becoming completely distracted by the opportunities it presented for exploration with curious lips. The tug sideways of a smile was less of a smirk than it would ordinarily have been and, leaning forward to reclaim his favoured spot nuzzled against the crook of her neck, made a suggestion he hoped would reduce the likelihood of them spending their first time rutting up against a kitchen bench.

"Time to show me around that shower then."