Maybe One Day, Perhaps

Posted on Sat Apr 11th, 2026 @ 12:24pm by Staff Sergeant Nathanial "Nate" Cusack & Warrant Officer Iryna Voznyuk

Mission: Royal Mail
Location: Personal Quarters
Timeline: MD 452, Evening
3675 words - 7.4 OF Standard Post Measure

Iryna sighed as she pressed the door chime to the Nate’s quarters. She had no idea if he was asleep or about to leave for his shift. She had had lost track of him the last few days with their new guests on board with him in medical now. She yawned and waited to hear that she could come in. Normally she would have just gone in but after being separated for a few days she felt odd about it.

She heard a call and stepped inside and closed the door. “Hey…” she greeted.

To say it was taking the man a while to adjust to a new schedule was putting things lightly. Of course, deployed on active duty often meant long hours with little sleep and poor nutrition, but it had been a while now since Nate Cusack had been knee-deep in mud holding sentry until dawn. Becoming a student again, particularly one learning on the job, was a whole different domination of time and attention and...it was getting the better of him.

Which was to say, he had no idea what day it was and hadn't kept very good track of the last time he'd even spoken to Iryna, much less spent any time with her. This was partially due to the amount of reading and case studies he was being lumbered with but more specifically because of how busy she'd been now that security had newcomers to keep track of. Eventually, it might have occured to him that it suggested Iryna did most of the chasing; right now, he was doing his best to make it look like he hadn't just been sprung passed out on his own couch.

The way his hair stuck out from his head, along with the indent from the cushion still smushed into the side of his face, told another story.

"Hey." With some effort, he coaxed both eyes open, though one lagged a little behind the other. At the same time, his mind was scurrying to recall whether he was supposed to be expecting her or not.

It took her eyes a few long moments to adjust to the darkness and she bit her lip to stop the laughter when she finally did adjust. “Get into bed. I’ll come back later.” The woman said smiling a little bit as she took in him attempting to open his eyes and the way the sofa marked his face. She stayed firmly by the door amused as well as worn out.

"That started out so promising."

Of all the moods that were likely when it came to Nate Cusack, finding him inclined towards boyish mischief was usually at least one of the less painful. When aided by the punch-drunk vagueness of fatigue-stupor, it gave his smirk a slightly goofy quality but did little to curb his insistence. A hand reached out, landing gently on Iryna's shoulder in an attempt to draw her forward. "Get in here."

The woman moved forward until she landed on his lap. She attempted to be lighter but the heaviness of the equipment belt she wore now with the security level being increased made it difficult. “I am here.” She declared wrapping an arm around his neck.

It was not the most graceful catch Nate had ever made, but given the momentum and subsequent shift in weight, it was probably enough that it was, at least, a catch. The fact that it required several steps backwards and an eventual abrupt seat on his couch was just a matter of finesse; he was out of practise, and also somewhat out of breath.

"Well that's step one taken care of." Despite the jest, Nate paused, pulled back enough to be able to get a good look at Iryna's face, and let his eyebrows carry the bulk of his next question. "You good?"

Iryna laughed softly at the jest and grinned before she sombre at the look and question. Was she good? Yes she was she decided could be her anwser as she was that. Nothing bad was happening to her than being on strange shifts. “I am good, are you?” She wondered picking up one of the many PADDS around the couch that he had been studying.

"If you discredit current attempts to bore me to death with case studies, sure."

Years ago, when he'd first qualified for medical school and then ditched it to chase his father's approval, Nate had been a lot better scholar than seemed to come natural these days. Of course, training facilities on board Atlantis were hardly world-class and part of the frustration came from the uncertain priorities of a crew stranded amongst strangers. Focusing on the needs of those he served alongside was a great first-step but then what? What was the point of learning how to dissect a Realian if they were only a few months away from never seeing one again.

Like so many things in his life, Nate was already starting to chaff from the limitations of his new role, though he was still arguably a lot more useful than a sniper without a fixed target.

"Boring you to death is better than you dying in some bloody mess." She commented and pressed a kiss to his temple. "At least you do not have me breathing down your neck or having to deal with... the other crew, though their Executive Officer is interesting," Iryna admitted thoughtfully, thinking of last night.

Of no surprise to anyone, Nate had a variety of opinions about this current situation, none of which lent themselves towards being impressed with opening the ship up as a royal carriage. It was bad enough coming to terms with the threats on the outside of the ship without inviting them on board, but as usual, nobody has asked his opinion and cross-examining Iryna about it wasn't exactly fair; he could concede that much. The topic still promoted an immediate deadpan, and the slow inhalation of a man doing his best to keep his irritation in check.

"That doesn't sound promising." Interesting was usually code for 'trying to be polite but struggling', at least in Nate's book.

“No… she made me think about things.” She admitted with a soft tone as she turned his face towards hers. “She made me think about us.” She breathed, wishing that maybe she had left it until another time and place but she was not sure that she could if she left it till after she had slept.

There had been progress, at least, in the restoration of Nate's outlook since their catacomb wandering had provoked an angry outburst at the universe and all its failings. Never one to take the fast route towards acceptance, the fact that he had worn his frustration with their current situation so visibly on his sleeve was, in Nate Cusack terms, a significant improvement. True anger tended to simmer, leading to introverted broodiness that prompted him to sulk in corners. Now, the pantomime concern as his eyebrows knitted together still conveyed genuine hesitation but, with it, there came a sparkle of good humour that suggested it wasn't a terrible time to broach the subject.

"Well, now that sounds even less promising." He was teasing, it was decidedly different to the fear of commitment pretty much everyone else expected from him. "She didn't offer to set you up with her bug-eyed cousin and his many tentacles, I hope."

"Not today, that might be a conversation for another day, if this conversation goes badly," Iryna said quietly before she rolled her eyes, wishing she had left that thought in her head. "I... I... I like us... I like how I am in this relationship, and I would not hesitate to make it more." She whispered finally as she gathered her courage.

There was no doubt that the Nate Cusack who had stepped into her unit, all swagger and smart retorts, would have balked at the sheer alienness of interpersonal connection on any level. Even now, he would have sworn he wasn't very good at it even though it wasn't a particular strength of his to speak up when his confidence was failing him. For better or worse, Nate had always been a guy who fared better when judged by his actions rather than the garbled mess that fell out of his mouth on a daily basis, and that was still no guarantee his behaviour was much of an improvement.

Recently, the only doubt worthy of any benefit on his behalf was the increased incidents of trying. Holding a conversation with him didn't involve quite so many eggshells, and a certain amount of persistence had revealed him capable of a surprising amount of introspection and insight. All the mushy stuff though?

That was still a work in progress.

They had reached a point, at least, where his efforts to pull back a little to read the expression on Iryna's face were at least an authentic attempt to gauge her motivation. This wasn't a conversation Nate necessarily knew how to have but they were past the point, at least, of him trying to shut it down entirely.

"What kind of 'more' are we talking about?" A pair of hitched eyebrows pushed the pragmatic approach, without any of a younger Nate's tendency towards defensiveness.

It took everything that she had to not move off of his lap and leave as she watched him go through several different stages of emotion before he finally spoke up. “Maybe living in the same space?” She quickly answered softly. She wanted him and she was sure that he wanted her as they were exclusive in her mind, they sought each other out.

It was very subtle, so much so that it might have passed unnoticed under less-capable scrutiny, but there was a singular, rather comical, gleam of relief in Nate's eyes as he processed the proposal...which was blessedly not a proposal. He could have dredged up a hundred good reasons for why anything that permanent was a terrible idea, each of which would centre around the basic premise that she could do far better.

He, on the other hand, would struggle to improve his luck. She was already several tiers out of his league.

"You know that would mean putting up with my snoring fulltime, right?" The jest was a good sign, if for no other reason that it wasn't quite pitched at a dismissive level. Instead, it was far more reminscent of the way Nate processed important things, when he was trying to actually think about what he was saying for once.

She offered a shadow of a smile at the jest. He was trying to think before he spoke. “I can just smother you with a pillow.” Iryna murmured as she pushed herself up off his lap to stand. “Think about it okay. It doesn’t need an answer right now but think about it.” She suggested trying to give him processing space when she had just dumped all of it and herself on his lap.

"Uh, uh, uh."

Even as she'd risen, Nate had snagged a hand to drag her back down, this time to a more comfortable position that allowed him to settle his arms around her waist and rest his chin on top of her head. With her leaning back against him rather than facing him, there was just enough buffer for a trademark maneuver; where Nate snuck sincerity amidst playfulness in an effort to combat their combined insecurities.

"We're not dumping-and-ditching this time. Must have been a heck of a conversation with Bug-Eyed Betty, I thought you preferred your independence."

Nate still wasn't used to seeing Iryna's vulnerable side, couldn't quite align it with the memories of countless sparring matches that had almost always ended with him getting his ass handed to him. It irked him a bit, if he was honest, that he was the reason she second-guessed herself so often and he still hadn't quite got the hang of the fact she could floor him with a simple confession a heck of a lot faster than she ever decked him with her fist. As much as he appreciated he wasn't the best at facilitating these kind of conversations, Nate still needed a bit better understanding of what was going on in her head before he even knew where to start with figuring out his own.

“I was not planning to dump and ditch. I was planning to give you space to consider what I had said.” She said smiling at the way he pulled her back and settled her close. It was familiar enough that it calmed her down mentally and physically allowing her space to settle. “We sleep in each other’s quarters most nights. It just… I don’t know seems the next step.” She finally decided.

It took a considerable amount of restraint, and no small measure of personal growth, for Nate to silence his pragmatic side long enough to keep it from bulldozing Iryna's intent. He supposed, on one level, the implication of explicit exclusivity had a point to it, though in practical terms it was pretty much unnecessary, at least from his point of view. The concept of playing-the-field was considerably less appealing than it had once been, particularly in a restrictive environment where his reputation wasn't inclined to do him any favours. It also just hadn't occurred to him to bother; as Iryna had said, there weren't many nights in the week where they slept apart and, when they did, it was more the product of clashing duty shifts than intentional separation. It probably didn't make a whole heap of sense to monopolise two living quarters, Nate was just surprised she was so willing to close off her escape route.

"You think we can wrangle a cushy upgrade?," he teased, leaning forward so that his chin dug into her shoulder.

It was almost agony to wait there as she could feel the cogs whirling in his brain. She could feel the weight of what she was doing but it was now or never in her opinion. She would take whatever he said yes or no. “Most likely not.” She breathed not reacting as he leaned closer and put his chin on her shoulder. She was not sure if that was a yes or no but it sounded more positive and open to at least the potential of it all.

Sometimes, Nate's silences were sullen, the result of poor emotional regulation coupled with insecurity dressed up as irritation. Other times, like now, his silences took on a more thoughtful, albeit calculating, quality. He was, whether he knew it himself some days, a decently clever man. There'd been plenty of impetus lately towards making changes for improvement, and when it all boiled down, he found himself more concerned for Iryna's readiness than his own. That surprised him a little; he'd never been against the idea of settling down, he'd just never had a clear mental picture of what it would actually look like.

"Is it cheating to do a trial run?" For once, his tone was reasonable. "Go a couple of weeks, see if we survive."

Iryna slowly shook her head and accepted his words for what they were an attempt as trying. He wanted to try and see if it was possible for them to leave together without killing each other. It was easy enough and she did not need to remind him again it happened practically now. “Not cheating. Any good mission operation has a trial run where possible.” She finally said aloud.

The comparison earned her a playful jab to the side. "Next you'll be trying to control rations and put me on latrine duty." Nate hesitated, his face screwed into an attempt at nonchalance to mask a twinge of concern. They had bunked down with each other more often than not and he'd even go as far as to say he preferred the nights where she stayed over, or vice versa, to the enforced solitude of clashing duty shifts. It was more the underlying statement than any practical difference, but he supposed that was kind of the point.

Maybe it wasn't fair to keep going without making an effort at explicit committment.

"Do we have to rock-paper-scissors who gives up their quarters?"

“No. Your quarters for this experiment will be fine.” Iryna said without hesitation. When they had all moved out of the barracks and put into different areas of the ship she had never really done much with her quarters. It would be easier for her one way or another. “I have no commitment to my quarters.”

"It's not like you have to tell anyone yet," Nate pointed out, for once decently cautious about how he phrased his words. As far as he could tell, the sensible thing to do was just live it out for a while without putting it on the books; that way, if the inevitable happened and she wound up wanting to castrate him, Iryna still had a space to go. "Hell, we could always take bets on how long it takes anyone to figure it out."

“So you want me your dirty little secret?” She laughed softly trying to get the heavy feeling between them to leave. She could feel out cautious he was being, he was being measured in his tone and phrasing as bd she could not help but feel guilty for causing that.

The putter of Nate's lips was instantly dismissive, a scoff of disbelief at his own expense for once. "Not really my style. I don't do subtle, right?" It was an observation she'd flung at him enough over the years, originating as partial disbelief that such a gifted marksman couldn't figure out how to wield the same kind of discretion outside a sniper's nest. Now, he shot it back at her, along with a playful dig into her ribs. "And Voznyuk doesn't paint herself into a corner without an exit strategy. Can't hurt to leave your quarters allocated for now, keeps things simple if you decide you need them."

"No, it very much doesn't hurt." She promised and slowly pushed herself up to stand, and turned to look at him. "I am sorry I woke you up with all of this, though." She admitted quietly as she started to undo her belt to dump it aside. "I did not think it could wait when I wanted to talk to you, as it has been a few days."

There was a moment of palpable mental calculation before Nate's expression shifted to concessionary surprise. "I guess it has been. Hard to keep track of these days. Not all of us are hob-knobbing with the bug-eyes." A rakish waggled of his eyebrows succumbed to a smirk before a genuine query pushed its way through Nate's nonsense. "How's that going anyway? Other than the existential dread," he added.

“Dread and crisis but not to bad. The princess arrives tomorrow… or tonight?” Iryna said looking at the chrono meter with a sigh. She was doing a lot more thanks to Gerhard’s mysterious sickness so she was going to have about five hours sleep before she needed to be up and ready to escort the princess. She started to undo her uniform flight suit. “I can sleep here right?” She asked suddenly pausing in her actions.

With a spread of his hands, Nate affected a playful shrug. "Mi casa es su casa." It took a deliberate effort not to add 'apparently' to the end of the declaration, which Nate would have considered no small amount of personal growth. The times where Iryna didn't give back as good as she got and then some usually meant, he had learnt, that the insecurities he'd never realised she'd had were running pretty close to the surface. Perching himself on the edge of the couch, poised to stand, he added, "You eaten yet?"

The woman was wrestling her flight suit off and shook her head. “Nope. And no time too if I want to get more than four hours of sleep.” She sighed. Sitting down to get the rest of it off. “Gerhard is unwell so I’m doing a lot more.” It was not common knowledge among the crew yet.

For once, Nate had paid attention to the earlier shift briefing and, as a novelty, found himself working in an environment where medical priorities were something he didn't have to rely on scuttlebutt to uncover. "Pretty convenient timing." Like most of Nate's jabs, there was a hint of pointed opinion beneath the sarcastic humour.

“Timing is timing.” Iryna shrugged. She knew a few people felt the same but she could not be mad at the man’s timing. It could have happened to anyone it was just unfortunate it was Gerhard and right now when they needed him.

With just the right amount of smug charm that had earned him extra laps in the past, Nate eased back against the couch, stretched out both arms to settle along its back and feigned a thoughtful, puzzled frown. "Confined to quarters while the ships gets overrun with alien royalty, Gerhard's smarter than he looks. I wonder if it's communicable..."

“Well you are medical.” The woman commented smiling as she got the flight suit and boots off and just sighed in relief at being lighter. “but not entirely sure who would take over if I am not there,” she admitted. “It might be left to you.” She pointed out quietly.

The grimace on Cusack's face, whilst comical, was not so much exaggerated as brutally honest. "Well if that's not a good reason to make sure you don't fall to pieces," he declared, rising suddenly to step forward and scoop her abruptly over his shoulder, "then I don't know what would be. Shower then bed with you, sir. Doctor's orders."